While not for everybody, eating ass seems wonderfully democratic; everybody has an ass. But these are the same reasons some unenlightened men won't go down on women, so I'm going to make an effort to change the way I think about sucking on a butt. So I'll just say, I am fundamentally indifferent to having my basement cleaned. It's gentler and more impromptu than pegging or even putting a thumb up there. Especially if it's as delightful as Jeffrey makes it out to be. That's just me, though. I'm as naughty as the next girl, but anything below the Mason-Dixon line during cunnilingus just sort of feels like a well-meant wet-willy. Let us, grownups and sexually open-minded people though we are, not kid ourselves about the primary function of the asshole. You should not consume "Laura Meets Jeffrey" in one go.
I don't want our readers to get fatigued. Especially if it's as delightful as Jeffrey makes it out to be. I think it's possible to be safe and clean without stripping sex of its essential dirtiness, and I'm afraid that our generation doesn't get that part of the fun of sex is that it's fucking disgusting. If you think about it, it's so easy, just a hop, skip and a jump from the dick note: Jeffrey is old school. Better than giving them a kidney or buying them a pretty little house or sending flowers "just because. A few weeks ago, I was just sitting there, not thinking about eating men's asses, when I received a review copy of a book billed as a real-life "Fifty Shades of Grey. Unless dudes are all secretly committed to babywipes and crack depilation, there is the potential for some funk. Put whatever you want up there, if you like it. While I love giving head, anything involving the butt does zero for me. As Emily helpfully pointed out, it comes down to preparedness and enthusiasm. Like I said, Jeffrey is old school. There's no additional equipment needed and no potential for actual physical pain. I'm not here to fight you. It can be a bit of a hairy, swampy abyss. She would swish a client's anus with mouthwash and then suck on it for an appreciable passage of time. It's possible that the guy isn't into it and he'll go into lockdown, I'll be trapped in his butt like a bank safe in the Most Awry Heist of All Time. I like sex to be a little dirty and sloppy, which is why reading "Laura Meets Jeffrey" made me a little nostalgic for a time I never knew, a pre-"Reality Bites," disease-ignorant idyll of full bushes and anuses licked to sparkling. I expect them to look and taste like a hairy sack of glands. Hell, I love a BAD erotic memoir. I don't know what it said about me that I was immediately like, "Wait, but what television show??? I love a good erotic memoir. I'm not a germaphobe, either! That's how much Jeffrey Michaelson, the author, likes his ass-play. How's it going down there? He likes his women unshorn and his sex unprotected and filthy. One, it's not necessarily a given that he will like it, and don't you sort of have to
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